YOUVE GOT TO LAUGH….O/T.

This topic has 9 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 15 years, 1 month ago by TF_bliss.

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- 15/04/2011 at 5:59 pm #45941
  TF_MICK THE BOOKIE
  ~shh ~shh ~shh A very large pregnant Jamican lady had a nasty fall down the steps of her high rise flat.She was knocked about a bit,and she slipped into a coma.
  After 2 weeks the tough lady`s eyes flickered,and she came round with 3 nurses and a Doctor eagerly waiting by her bedside.
  “Hello Dolores….How you feeling”? asked the Indian Doctor.
  “Jesus…what happened”? Dolores enquired.
  “Youve had a bad fall,and have been in a coma for 2 weeks” explained Dr Patel.
  “Oh my God…..Wheres my lump?…..Wheres my baby”?..asked Dolores as she started to get histerical.
  “Calm down now.Your twins are both fine and they are progressing in the Baby room”…said Dr Patel.
  “TWINS?…..Ive had twins”? Dolores blurted out.
  “Yes….as i say they are fine.but because you were in a coma we have had to register the birth,and name them”…..said Doc.
  “Who named them”?…enquired a very relieved Dolores.
  “Your brother Desmond named them”…said one of the nurses.
  “Oh my God…Hes totally thick is our Desmond…What the f*** did he name the girl”? Dolores asked.
  “He named the sweet little girl Denise”…answered the nurse.
  “Actually thats quite nice…i like that…and what about the boy”?…Dolores asked with a large smile on her face.
  “Denephew”…..giggled the Doctor.~shh ~shh ~shh ~shh ~clap ~clap ~clap ~clap ~clap ~clap
- 15/04/2011 at 6:02 pm #138083
  TF_Pikey
  You told us this joke on Sunday is it the only one you know ?
- 15/04/2011 at 6:14 pm #138085
  TF_MICK THE BOOKIE
  Hehe…I know Dave but i just love it…..Heres one for you.
  
  3 sisters Ann,Jan and Fanny all had big feet.Ann was a size 9…Jann was a size 10,and Fanny was a size 13.
  Ann and Jan go on a double date.Amazed one of the boys says….”God you two have got big feet”
  Ann replies…”You think they`re big….You should see our Fannys”……Boom Boom.~shh ~shh ~shh ~shh ~shh ~shh
- 15/04/2011 at 6:24 pm #138086
  TF_feeder
  mick you get worse thats being in herbies company probally.lol
- 15/04/2011 at 6:25 pm #138087
  TF_Dodge
  ~naughty ~naughty ~naughty Bookie …. them jokes are as bad as your horse racing tips ! ~sick LOL
- 15/04/2011 at 8:29 pm #138113
  TF_proper tidal boy
  BOOKIE GIVE UP FISHING AND BECOME A comedian pmsl
- 15/04/2011 at 9:27 pm #138121
  TF_herbie
  stick to fishing bookie~naughty
- 16/04/2011 at 9:45 am #138143
  TF_toplights
  Herbieeee,There’s nothing wrong with our Mick,a straight jacket wouldent put right.~clap
- 18/04/2011 at 3:34 pm #138291
  TF_howsmicha
  A rich mans wife came home while her husband was having a rest and said “daling ive some good news and some bad news witch do you want first?” He said im not feeling too good so give me the good news whereupon she said “well the air-bags on our brand-new top of the range BMW work perfectly”
- 19/04/2011 at 8:51 am #138387
  TF_bliss
  Participant
  During WW2 a farmer is sat at home reading his paper when theres a knock at the door.
  He gets up and answers it and its a US Naval Officer who says “Hi I’m Lance, I’ve come to take Nance to the Dance.” The farmer calls his daughter Nance and off they go.
  
  He has just settled down when theres another knock at the door – this time a US Air Force Officer – “Hi, I’m Joe, I’ve come to take Flo to the show.” Again he calls his other daughter Flo and off they go.
  
  Just sat down again and another knock which he answers to see a 6’6″ GI with a 60″ chest who says “Hi, I’m Buck…” the farmer says you can p**s off and slams the door in his face!
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